Why I’ll miss Tahoe

My dear friends,

This marks my final week in Tahoe before I drive back to Seattle for a few months. This Saturday, I take the 14 hour drive at once, and then wake up early on Sunday morning to fly out to Tel Aviv for a 2 week-long adventure with two of my best friends. Keep an eye out for a recap post on that trip later! While I’m sure it will be an absolute blast, I can barely get my head around the fact that I am counting down my last few days in the town I’ve called home for nearly 3 months, let alone think about flying halfway around the world in less than a week.

My time here in Tahoe has had it’s fair share of downs. The lack of snow combined with my injury last month have actually resulted in one of the more low-key ski seasons I’ve had in years. I had a few trips fall through and gas is expensive. I miss Amazon delivery. I miss my friends and family back home. I miss having a bedroom with a door on it. Sometimes, I get lonely or overwhelmed by living by myself in a town where I’m an outsider.

But, for every disappointing, lonely, or frustrating moment, I’ve had 10 more beautiful ones. The lack of snow led to some picturesque beach days. My injury gave me a reason to focus on my art, my reading, and my mental clarity. The trips that fell through meant more time to spend in Tahoe. Expensive gas meant more walking. No Amazon delivery meant less spending. The friends that I made here feel like family. No bedroom door means the dogs that live here can walk in and out of my room as they please. Living by myself has led to a sense of personal freedom that I know I’ll never give up.


I’ll miss Tahoe. I’ll miss the way you don’t lock your doors and the way icicles form outside my bedroom window. I’ll miss my favorite bartender, Domino, at my favorite bar, Whitecaps. I’ll miss the way the air feels fresh and sharp in the mornings before a big storm. I’ll miss the sound of waves lapping against the shore, as if I live next to the ocean rather than a large lake. I’ll miss the friendly hellos and good mornings from my roommates. I’ll miss the friends I made and the laughter we shared. I’ll miss the sunrise, the sunset, the stars and the moon. And probably, above all, I’ll miss Jackson and Tasha, the two dogs that live with me and stole my heart.

I’m thankful for the pain that comes with goodbyes, because it means my time here was worth it, and meaningful. I’m also beyond excited for what the future has in store for me- in two days I’ll be on a flight to experience some of the most beautiful scuba diving in the world with my best friend, and in two months I’ll be on the way to travel through Central and South America. Life is a magical, overwhelming whirlwind, and I’m loving every last minute of it.

Stay beautiful, friends.

Reflections after 27 years of life

My dear friends,

This past Wednesday I turned 27. If I’m being honest, it was a bittersweet day. If I’m being completely honest, it was mostly bitter.
On Monday I lost one of my closest friends unexpectedly. It was the kind of call you never want to receive, a sobbing friend on the line telling you that this girl with whom you spoke to not even 24 hours before, had passed. Life’s not fair sometimes.
I’m no stranger to death- unfortunately, I’ve experienced my fair share of loss in the last several years. But this particular death truly shook me to my core. It has caused me to reflect a lot on the question of free will, of pain, and of life’s meaning in general.
Looking back at this last year, I’ve experienced a lot of loss. 26 wasn’t an easy year for me, but growth rarely comes from complacency, so despite the pain and loss, I am grateful. And I am stronger than I’ve ever been. So without further ado, I’ll leave you with my top 5 life lessons from my 26th year of life:
1) I am the only person who can control my happiness. This one was a tough lesson to learn. It’s easy for me to fall into a pattern where I depend on others (a significant other, a friend, my family) to bring me happiness. While all of those relationships are wonderful to have, ultimately I’ve learned that my happiness is up to me, and me alone.
2) The most significant growth comes through hardships. Personal growth rarely comes from being stagnant. Experiencing the speed bumps in life are truly what causes us as humans to blossom.
3) With good friends, you can conquer the world. Remember what I said earlier about how only you can control your happiness? I stand by that, but remember, you’re nothing without the people you surround yourself with. Friends who support you, push you, and inspire you are invaluable, and I wouldn’t trade mine for all the money in the world.
4) Your dreams will never happen…if you don’t work hard to achieve them. I had spent most of my life dreaming of traveling the world, of living in a ski town, of working remote. But…I didn’t do anything about it. Finally, after having enough, I changed that. I went from the lowest point of my life to what has become some of the highest. But it took work.
5) It’s okay to be alone. Whether that’s going to a concert, eating dinner in your favorite restaurant, traveling to Texas, or moving to Tahoe, it’s okay to do it on your own. In fact, I would highly recommend it. Doing things by myself has made me fiercely independent, self-aware, and confident. Plus, I talk to myself all the time so it’s basically like I have company 😉

There you have it—all the wisdom I’ve acquired in the last year. Take it or leave it, and I hope you can grow from it.


I spent the first few hours of my 27th year hiking up Eagle Rock in North Lake Tahoe with a pot of yellow tulips for Kalli. They were planted in the snow as the sun rose in front of me. I love ya, girl.